The "Official" 2007 season for me

I've taken a few wonderful days off from writing, or doing anything related to anything I would write about- namely, moving. Actually, we've had some great family hikes in the woods, marathon walks while shopping (I'm REALLY sick of shopping) and an absolutely wonderful holiday season. Between Christmas, my birthday yesterday, Superman's birthday next Tuesday (we celebrated party #1 while out-of-town relatives were in the area), we've had much opening of presents, eating of cake and general excitement. It's a lot for a three and a half and almost two year old. So tempers are running a little short around here, especially if you're under 4 feet tall, although mom and dad have been a little tired at times, too.

Anyway, the 2007 season. Here's the big excitement. I've got the GYGO make-up-your-own triathlon on January 1st and 2nd. I'm the swim leg of a sprint triathlon in June, probably going to be the swim leg of another sprint towards the end of July, although that one needs a run leg for our team. But it all leads up to approximately August 12, 2007. That's when our family will grow by one member because I'm pregnant. It's a little early to make it known to the world in general, but all appropriate relatives have already been told, since I went to the doctor on Tuesday for my first ultrasound and we saw one little jelly bean in there with a healthy little heartbeat. I'm right now 7 weeks and 5 days along. My first 2 pregnancies were so easy and uneventful I was very lucky. This little one has been considerably less easy on me as I've been dealing with (morning) all-day sickness for the past few weeks. Fortunately I've got a stomach like a steal trap so there hasn't been much physical sickness, just constant, never-ending, uncontrollable nausea. And the tiredness. Have you heard me mention before that sometimes I'm tired? I didn't even know what tired was. NOW, I'm tired. I could sleep at any given moment, unfortunately that opportunity has not presented itself. Overall, however, I'm still very lucky, things are going well and we're going to blessed with another (and final) family member.
Off to visit with friends, I'm so lucky that our company was closed this week so I've been home with the boys. Things will only get more exciting from here. It's not likely that I'll be back to write before New Year's so I wish everyone a happy New Years and a wonderful 2007.

Reset

After my post yesterday- and thanks for the reminder that it's just life- I was feeling awful sitting here at work. So, I left a little early and headed home. I got home about 2:30pm and the house was.....empty! Paul had taken the boys to the park to play with their new remote control trucks and so it was just me (and the dogs and cats). I quickly cemented my butt to the couch, well, actually my entire left side because I was laying down. Grabbed the nice fuzzy blanket off the back of the couch, the dogs hopped up to lay on me and I NAPPED! It was one of the nicest naps I think I have ever taken. It got rid of my headache, improved my other nagging blahs and was just generally wonderful. By the time they came home at 3pm I was back to normal and ready to play. That was the second time, since we moved into our house over 3 years ago that I have ever been in the house by myself. It's the longest, too. It was just so nice to have some time to sit in the house without all the hustle, bustle and noise of everyone there. Now, with my improved mood, it's time to set some overall goals for 2007. Not resolutions, because they never work, just general goals.
- I'm going to worry about only myself. As long as I know that I've got nothing to be ashamed of in my work ethic, I'm going to do my best to ignore those around me that don't have a similar approach to work. Life's just not fair but dwelling on it won't help anything.
- Practicing the "attitude of gratitude". I've tried this before and I just can't stick with it. When I start to get aggravated about something at work or home, I've got to try to think about the positives. My job can be interesting, it is working towards the good of people and it allows us the luxury of having a parent at home with our boys during these important early years. Also, my husband does an excellent job at home and he's a great father. Sometimes I just get too wrapped in small details, and in feeling sorry for myself, to remember that. I'm so incredibly lucky.
- Without being selfish I do have to make myself a priority. Before I get so aggravated about things that I carry around a big angry pit in my stomach for days, I'm going to stop and figure out what I need. Getting to the gym and staying in shape are #1 priority personally. I'm going to try to eat better, take good care of myself and allow myself some time for me even if it does mean asking for some help. By leaving the house for an hour, I'm not putting other things ahead of the kids, I'm balancing my life and I've been mostly out of balance since becoming a mom.

I think those are the 3 biggies. Other than that we'll just take things as they come. A whole 10 days off to be at home is going to just be heaven! I can usually keep up on reading while at home, but I might not do much posting. So, Merry Christmas (or Happy Holidays) and a Happy New Year to all. The year 2006 had a lot of excitement, 2007 promises to be even better.

Rant to no one that will read it

I try not to talk about work too much here, because if ever someone at work found my blog it could be a major CLM (or Career Limiting Move). Mostly because I wouldn't have much good to say. Here's my end-of-the-year blowout of things that have built up over the year and need to be said, but actually uttering them to another person, especially my boss or a similar person in power above me- which is practically everyone, would be another CLM.
- Being here for 3 hours does not constitute a full day of work.
- If you're that sick, stay home, typhoid Mary. If however, you're not that sick, get your lazy butt into work like the rest of us.
- If you are that sick, but you've chosen to come in anyway, don't pretend you've got laryngitis for 4 days so we all feel sorry for you. We don't. And now we'll be annoyed if we catch your crud.
- E-mails sent out to large groups of people are often sent because they will affect said large group. The fact that no one alerted you specifically to the e-mail does not mean that the rules don't apply to you and it also doesn't mean that there's a conspiracy to keep you from vital information. It means that you should pay more attention before you delete e-mails.
- Yes, I leave at 3pm. No, I'm not leaving early. I wonder what you were doing at 4:50am when my car pulled into the parking garage. Sleeping? Yeah, leave me alone, I've done my time.
- I'm so glad I spent all the time preparing a presentation and then proofing a publication- on very little notice, so I could get NO credit for either of those efforts.

I feel better getting that off my chest. There's more, I know, but I am at work so I'll stop. Overall, though, I've got a decent job that affords us to have Paul be a stay-at-home dad with the boys. There are days that I resent that but most days I'm happy for it because I know it's the best place they could be. With the only person I'd like to have them with, other than me. If I ever do win the lottery, though, I don't even think I'll empty my desk. I'd just grab Frank, my fish, and hit the door. Think I'll get back to cleaning my desk.

Friends

I received this in an e-mail and while I absolutely abhor forwarded e-mails generally, the sentiment is nice and I thought I'd share:

This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where one could read it every day. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.
1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. You are special and unique.
8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
10. When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look.
11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
And always remember....when life hands you Lemons, grab some Tequila and Salt and call me over!
Good friends are like stars........ You don't always see them, But you know they are always there.

Okay, I'm not actually a fan of tequila and we might not personally be friends, but maybe pass this along to those who mean a lot to you. The grammar's also poor, but that's not the point.

A second mortgage in the future

To stay in the same vein as last night's post, here's more information about my children's eating habits. This afternoon at 3pm the boys shared 3 apples worth of slices. Then at 5pm dinner came along and here's what they ate. Each one had an individual package of Annie's Organic Macaroni and Cheese, about 1/3 of a can of corn, a large portion of instant mashed potatoes (they're obviously carb loading for something- oh yeah, the life of a pre-schooler) and a leg off of their gingerbread men. Superman then polished off a large serving of applesauce. He finished and asked for a yogurt, but we decided to cut off the eating for the night. He didn't protest enough to show that he really needed that yogurt. One evening last week they each had 1 apple, 1 pear and THREE blueberry waffles followed by yogurt. I can't really complain about the things they request for food, their favorites are fruit, yogurt and cheese- but sometimes the quantities just amaze me. I wonder how we'll ever feed 2 teenage boys and any possible future children as well. Maybe that will be the answer to my own diet- there just won't be enough food to feed all of us, so I might lose some weight. They're probably just in concurrent growth spurts, there are plenty of days that dinner consists of picking at approximately 6 bites of food before leaving the table. They probably regulate their intake better than most adults as this age- when they're not hungry, they don't eat. No issues about it.

It's starting to turn a little colder, guess it had to happen in December since it is the northeast. We've had so many recent days of temps in the 50s we were getting pretty spoiled. Highs for the rest of the week will be in the 30s and 40s. At least my exercise has already moved indoors, the outdoor air at those temperatures feels like it instantly freezes my lungs. The only real trouble I've had with my asthma over the past few years has been out in the cold. Not sure about tomorrow morning's workout, I think I'll go for the treadmill hill workout. If I give it a good hour or so that will be a decent effort. Work starts to clear out tomorrow, by Friday afternoon I should be just about the only person there, okay not really since there are a few thousand of us at work. But the coworkers in my immediate are will all be gone, nice and quiet.

The most disgusting dunk

When I was in grad school, my roommate and I used to work towards the "perfect bite". On those days when we were particularly overwhelmed by school stuff, we'd hit the cupboards and look for the ingredients to a cure for life- the perfect bite. It generally came down to: a pretzel with peanut butter, chocolate and some caramel would make it better, if available. (Sound familiar to those that have tried a Take 5?) Anyway, tonight I think that Superman, while wearing his Superman costume at the dinner table, perfected the most disgusting dunk/bite ever. He had a blueberry waffle with some pineapple- okay, that's fine, but here comes what he dunked it in- hold your stomachs- tomato soup with cheese! Yuck. He eventually decided that he'd like to just have some tomato soup and then switch to the blueberry waffle for dessert, which was fine. But for those few messy dunked bites I really had to not watch him because I wanted to gag if I thought too hard about that combination.

Kickboxing class this morning was great, except that the heating/cooling system in the aerobics room at the gym is broken so it's constantly pouring heat into the room. I generally work up enough of a sweat during kickboxing anyway, so I didn't really need the added help of the heating system blowing on my spot. Being the week before Christmas, attendance at the gym, and work in general, was lower so I probably could have moved to another spot in class that wasn't so close to the heating vent. But we're such creatures of habit that I have to be in that spot for class otherwise, I don't know, I'll try a kick and knock myself on my butt. Not that I haven't almost done that while in my regular spot, but it's my comfort zone.

The last week at work before Christmas break is always a quiet one. Sounds like I'll be the only one of 11 of us still at work for Thursday and Friday. I've got a couple experiments, a paper to proof and some notebook documentation to do, other than that I should have some time to catch up on some blogs. I'm also going to get ready for the GYGO New Years Day triathlon. Mine will actually be completed on January 2nd, since that's when the pool opens again. I'm going longer on the swim, shorter on the bike and the shortest on the run- since that's my idea of a good triathlon. I think I'll go with about 1200 yards swimming, 10 miles biking and 2 miles running. At some point I'll post a season and goals for 2007, I'm working on some stuff.

Burb 'em like Tupperware

Ever get in the pool, put your goggles on, start swimming and then feel the slow dripping of a leaky goggle as the water ever so slowly builds up and sloshes around in your eye? I hate that feeling. Especially when I've said "okay, let's time this 200 yards", so I won't even let myself stop and fix it at once. I have to try to put a hand up in the middle of the flip turn to burp the goggle and seal it again. But the water that's already in there still sloshes around. Until I get to the end of the 200 and realize that I don't have my contacts in so I can't read the clock again to see the time. Idiot. It was just one of those mornings. When the alarm went off I should have rolled over and gone back to sleep. I'm still battling this lingering cold and so breathing at the pool had a new level of complication to it. Sometimes the 3-stroke bilateral just didn't get enough air in make it all 3 subsequent strokes. And before just about every flip turn I poked my head up to breathe so I could make it through the flip turn before poking my head up to breathe again. Should have just stuck with open turns but that's my own little bit of stubbornness.

Yesterday began the craziness that is the kids' Christmas gifts inundation. The first box came in the mail and then Uncle George came over for dinner with gift cards. The boys know credit cards (how sad is that considering they're 3 1/2 and not even 2), so they're happy they get to go to Target to spend their own credit cards. The first present had books, music and a puzzle. All big hits at our house. Every year I think we should cut back on what we buy or what they get. Every year they get too much. I know my parents said the same thing and I think I grew up with an appropriate appreciation for what I have, but you never know. We're so lucky to have our family, our friends and our health- everything else is just icing on the cake.

I worked hard for that lunch

We had a holiday fun run/walk today at work, sponsored by the fitness center. A friend and I decided we'd opt for the 2 mile walk since we had stuff to do after lunch and the site of me after a 3-mile run is not something anyone should have to see. Also, there are so many people that run that the line for the showers is ridiculously long and then there's no way I can get it all done in my hour for lunch. I didn't even change out of my jeans, shirt and sweater because I figured a leisurely 2 mile walk wouldn't be enough to get sweaty. I did put on my good sneakers, though, just because that's what they're for. Well, we started out and then decided that we'd do the 3 miles after all, so we had to push the pace a bit. We finished in under 45 minutes, a total of 3.2 miles. We were cruising pretty good for walking and I was SWEATING. Not just a little damp, no, I had sweat dripping off the back of my hair down my neck and the front of my shirt was pretty wet. Thankfully, they handed out t-shirts at the end of the walk and I always have a spare (clean) sports bra in my gym bag so when I got back to the office I changed into the Fun Run/Walk t-shirt and now I don't stink. Turned out to be a better workout than I had anticipated which is good because I missed this morning so now I don't have guilt for the day.

The boys and I are off to have a quick visit with grandma and grandpa after work this afternoon since he came home from the hospital yesterday. It was quite a shock seeing him there, after all, my dad's not a sick old person, right? I hope he takes good care of his health from now on, if not for me, I want him at my boys' graduations, weddings and everything else in between. I have to remember when I get older to take good care of myself because it causes children stress when parents won't do what they're supposed to in order to stay healthy.

The slothful weekend

This weekend I had a cold, the kids must have been sick because they napped both days and we didn't really do much of anything productive. But it was what needed to be done, I think.

My Dad's still in the hospital, he was hoping to come home today but the bloodwork wasn't what the doctors had hoped for. I went down to visit this afternoon and we sat around and talked and then played some board games. It was something we never would have done otherwise, so I guess there was a bright side to his hospitalization. Beside the obvious benefit of insuring his health as much as we can. Thanks to everyone that said a prayer for us.

I did get back to the workouts this morning, though, and it felt good. I hit the treadmill for 1.5 miles and 10:00 pace. I've decided I'm going to stick with that pace for a while and try to increase my distance so it becomes more comfortable. I'd be happy with that pace when I'm able to take on a 5- or someday, 10k. After the treadmill we had a circuit class. That one's always pretty high intensity. One minute at each of the stations, stuff like jumping jacks, rowing machine, pushups, planks, balance reaches, stationary cycle, abs, etc. It's a full 40 minute class and always a great workout. Felt good to get back on track. Tomorrow, back on the treadmill and then to Butts & Guts!

I had the curious experience today of my first anonymous comment that seemed like it was an insult. From a post back in September, where I mentioned losing some of Superman's cloth diapers. If anonymous is reading- I lost them because they were packed away in a bin or bag with other clothes and I can't remember which of the 17 bins/bags of toddler clothes in the attic it is. I'm happy that you never lost a diaper, rubber pant or diaper pin, apparently you're a better parent than I. Thanks for sharing.

And then, another day off

I planned to get up and swim yesterday but I woke up with a nasty cold- I think it's the post-flight home cold that I almost always get after traveling. Then Superman was up over night so I just slept in a little before going to work.

This week seemed to last forever at work. I only got in 3 good workout days which was a little disappointing but I am just exhausted. Having 2 colds within a week and a half has taken a lot out of me so I'm not going to let myself feel too guilty.

My dad was admitted to the hospital last night for abnormal heart function. The top of the heart isn't beating in sync with the bottom half. So he'll be in the hospital until they're relatively sure that he hasn't developed a blood clot- something that seems to run in his family. It's a sobering thing, to be faced with the reality that my parents are getting older and I can't just take for granted that they'll be here for the kids' high school graduations, college graduations, wedding days, etc. But I'm sure hoping that they will be. Keep your fingers crossed for my dad, or say a little prayer if you could. Thanks.

I need swim gear help!

I'm trying to decide what my Christmas and birthday presents will be. Since I'm declaring 2007 the year of the swim, I'm focusing on swim gear.

Do I want the plastic paddles or the neoprene gloves? Which type of plastic paddle if that's the way to go? (I've read the descriptions at tyr.com but I'm not sure what will help me the most)
Do I want short fins or long ones?
What else if out there that I might want?

The only thing I don't need is the SwimP3. While I get bored half to death with running, I could swim all day- no problem, ever.

If you have any of this cool swim gear, or if it's on your wish list, please let me know what you think.

Feels good to get back to it

Yesterday I did get up for Gutts & Butts class, after missing class last week for travel, those squats were killer!! I got in some time on the elliptical trainer before class as well. This morning was kick-my-ass boot camp, which, as usual, kicked my ass. I'm just feeling a little run down lately so I hung out on the recumbent cycle after bootcamp instead of the walking hill workout I'd done the last couple times.

I think I'm going to stick with my current schedule until the new year, then I'm going to work on some more swimming. I think that 2007 will be the year of the swim. I'm planning to buy myself some paddles and maybe fins for Christmas, and I know my mom's planning to get me the grab bag Speedo- so it's likely to be quite a pattern! But any suit will work fine for me.

Yesterday morning was the first snow around here. It didn't accumulate, but the kids were so excited to see the snow fall. When I called home around 8am, Paul was already bundling them up to go outside and play. They both had their strollers outside and they were "catching" the snowflakes. It's going to be so much fun playing out in the snow this winter. When I got home from work tonight we went out to play. The boys bundled up in winter coats and hats and we played in the yard until after dark. We had the flashlights out and we spent a good 45 minutes racing around the house with the dogs. Always good to get out some of that "boy energy" that gets pent up all day. I always have a good time when we all play outside, even when it's cold or raining (as long as it's a warm rainy day). I'm hoping for a repeat of last night because it was actually a good sleeping night. Superman made it through the night and Hot Wheels only got up once, quickly going back to sleep about 3am. I'm still on catch-up, though, so I could definitely use a few more nights like that to feel rested again.


Spin class tomorrow morning with yoga stretch after. That always feels good.

Nothing to report

My weekend off turned into a Monday morning off from the gym as well after last night's adventures with Hot Wheels. I'm wondering whether he was afraid that when I said I had to go to work today that I would be gone for a few days again, despite my reassurance that I would be back for dinner. Just before bedtime last night he became very upset and started crying for seemingly no reason. I was finally able to calm him down and get him to sleep, although when I checked on him half an hour later he was still doing the hitched breathing that remains long after the crying has subsided. About an hour after I checked on him he started sobbing again and wanted me to "have a sleepover" so I laid in his bed thinking I could still get back to my bed before 11pm. Not so much. He was inconsolable for hours, and I even gave him some Motrin and some Mylicon to try to alleviate the aches he claimed. I wouldn't have given him the Motrin except that it was soon after I came in and he said his head hurt, so I thought it would head off a fever if it was coming. The Mylicon is pretty inocuous- any parent of an infant loves the gas-relieving Mylicon drops. He had some gas and that was my second guess. He finally fell into fitful sleep some time after 1am but he was up again about 3:30am. When my watch alarm went off at 4:30am, I tried to get out of the bed, but he awoke again and started sobbing, so I shut off the alarm and went back to my cramped position that resembled something similar to a person sleeping, but not quite. I decided that the gym could wait one more day. When he woke up a little before 7am he was still very upset. We checked his temp and it was 99.9 F, unusual for him to be running any fever and he tends to run low, like me, with a norm in the low 97's, so that might have contributed to his discomfort. About 15 minutes after another dose on Motrin he seemed fine. I headed off to work, a bit late, but I got there. Not that it was great to be back- even with the pain of traveling, I did enjoy the time away. I was told there might be another training class opportunity in either February or April- one within driving distance and the other just a short flight, so that would be do-able. I'm always excited after coming back from a training or a meeting where I've got a renewed sense of purpose for my job. Funny how it barely takes until lunch time for that enthusiasm to be beaten out of me once again.

There's nothing quite like coming home at the end of a day, though. I was a little late- since I went in late, so it was almost dark when I got home. We'll probably throw on a movie in a few minutes and hang out in the family room for a while. That's always fun. If it's nice tomorrow we'll get out for a walk when I get home, but it's dark a little after 4:30pm, so it's not as much fun until spring. But Hot Wheels and Superman have way-y-y-y-y too much energy for staying indoors all day, as they should being preschool boys. So, tomorrow's it's back to the gym and back to after-work walks. Good for everyone.

p.s. Aren't they so handsome?

Home, sweet home

Last night, after being awake for over 30 hours (the second 24 hour+ stint without sleep in less than a week) I hit the sheets in my own bed for the first time since Monday morning. The week has its good and bad points. The training, which is the reason I traveled out to lovely Fullerton, CA- was very well done so the overall trip was a huge success. Well, I guess the true success will be measured on Monday when I see whether I have retained any of the information in the 3-day info dump, I mean class. I also had a great dinner on Monday night with some friends. That's the end of highlights, the rest was sort of crappy. I was up over 24 hours to start the trip- then Monday night I ate something that didn't agree with my stomach so I slept on the bathroom floor and intermittently napped over night. The weather there was actually colder than here in CT, so no outdoor pool. The fitness center's indoor pool was about 20 feet long, so I didn't get any swim workouts in. I got 3 workouts in, despite an awful cold that hit Tuesday morning. I took a spin class that may have been the most difficult one that I have ever taken. The instructor was great- right up until the point when she picked a drill that required that we point our toes down- something never done in real life. It triggered an awful charlie horse in my calf muscle. Then coming home I was hoping to get out on an earlier flight, but there were no options before the 11pm red eye, so I sat in the airport for 5 hours waiting to leave. Then I couldn't sleep on the plane, so that was why I ended up with the second 24 hour+ no-sleep period. It was also probably the worst nutritional week of my entire life. I was a little emotional about being away from the kids for 5 days (although they were fine with it), it wasn't nice weather to be outside, any all my meals were on the company card. So, if I wanted some dessert I figured I'd treat myself- three dinners in a row. I had planned to eat in a nice Italian restaurant in the hotel, but it was closed. So I ate all my meals from the hotel cafe, which was just alright. Breakfast was good, though, I ordered in my room Wed and Thurs morning. A yummy vegetable omelet with spinach, mushroom and cheese.

Here I sit now, still pretty exhausted after getting some sleep last night, but not enough to make up for the past week. I'm hoping to nap this afternoon when I put Superman down to rest. I've still got this head cold so I'm taking the weekend off from workouts, I'll get back to it on Monday morning. Bright and early.

The best part of the week, though, was coming home. As soon as I opened the door and came in the house I got a chorus of "Mommy's home!" and I was tackled with giant hugs. It's great to be home.

Apparently, I've got time

I've been trying for an hour and a half to place an order through the Walmart website because there's no way I was leaving my house this morning like a regular 4:30am work morning, just to stand in line to buy some toys. I'd much rather sit and swear at my computer for slow load times and error messages on websites, but if I can get these 4 items in my shopping cart- Santa's just about finished for the year already. So here I sit.

I hope everyone else had a nice Thanksgiving. We had a good time. I am lucky to have just about the most awesome husband in the world who cooked a great turkey, with all the fixins' (except the Boston Market Stuffing) and did 90% of the work to clean the house and get ready. He's most definitely a keeper- in so many more ways than one. I ate relatively well for a Thanksgiving, knowing that I'd give in and eat more apple pie than I should, but I "budgeted" the calories by attending Master Blast on Wednesday. I did the 30 minutes of kickboxing, 30 minutes of step intervals and then 40 minutes of spin. It was a great class. Yesterday we also spent most of the morning cleaning and I scrubbed the hardwood floor in the kitchen, family room and hallway so that worked off a few more calories in itself. I think the house right now is the cleanest it has been since we moved in. The thing I like the least about having a ranch house is that when we have people over there's no real way to block off the bedroom areas. So, we have to clean them. With small children, no door's going to stay closed and they're not going to stay out- especially when there's a cat to chase there. It's one of the things we like about hosting Thanksgiving because we know that at least once a year all the furniture will get moved to vacuum, including the fridge, stove and dishwasher. Feels good to have a really clean house, even if it will be back to normal by mid-afternoon Saturday.

While cleaning the floors yesterday, though, I realized more closely the full extent of the damage we inflict upon the house regularly. Our hallway is regularly the site of Hot Wheels' car races. That's a great game we play when approximately 200 cars are raced a.k.a. hurled down the hall towards the baseboard molding at the end. That baseboard, and the ones on the side along the way down the hall, is pretty beat.

The kids all had a good time yesterday, too. There were the six cousins, ages 9, almost 6, 5, 3.5, almost 3 and almost 2. It's quite a bit of activity when we're all together and it's a good thing our basement is finished, otherwise the day would be chaos.

another Problem Loading Page from Walmart. com. I'm off to phone customer service before they're all sold out of stuff. Enjoy the weekend everyone. I'll be back in December. Oh yeah, and along with everyone else I was counting my blessings yesterday to give thanks. Life's great.

Parting thoughts

Between Blogger issues and computer issues it's been impossible to post for the past few days. Not that much has happened, but I've become accustomed to having a spot for my random ramblings and missed it. While I said the blog was just for me originally, I've been a bit geeked to see some comments of late so I don't want to stop posting and lose any potential new friends. That being said, I'll be taking some time off now. We've got weekend plans with company and stuff and I may not be able to check in. Then, Monday morning at 4am I leave for a business trip to Los Angeles. As in California, as in 3000 miles away from Hot Wheels and Superman (oh yeah, and my husband) for FIVE DAYS. Well, 4 and a half days because I'm taking the overnight flight Thursday and should be in my driveway by noon on Friday. I really don't want to go. I've only been away from the boys for one overnight, when I went to Timberman in August. I'm sure they'll probably make it through better than I will, they'll be a grandma and grandpa's for dinner one night, playing with their cousins at dinner another night, Dad's going to take them the Chuck E Cheese's, they'll probably have a pretty good time. I'll probably be anxious the whole time and not even take full advantage of the time I will have to myself. I'll be up to call them at 5am (8am here), so I think I'll get some outdoor swim workouts in the pool at the hotel- I've read it's in the 80's out there right now. I might even do some reading- or I'll SLEEP!!

Training stuff:
Swim yesterday was good. My 200yard time is consistently 3:36. I think I'm going to start some speed drills with 100s and 50s and then go back to the 200 repeats. I did one 500 yard timed swim and that was about 9 minutes. So my pace is consistent anyway.

Santa wasn't at the pool yesterday morning, but the hair tumbleweeds were. I had planned a last set of 100 kick, 100 pull, but a tumbleweed from the bottom lifted up and was in my lane. When I couldn't keep it in view I was afraid I'd run into it and then vomit in the pool, so I skipped the last sets and left.

This morning was kick-my-ass bootcamp and then I did the incline walking workout. Fifteen minutes at 4.0mph increasing the incline by 3% every 3 minutes. By the time I hit 12% I was basically holding on, but it was better than last week. At lunch today they've got the Thanksgiving MasterBlast class. It's 30 minutes each of kickboxing, step intervals, spin and then yoga. Not sure I'd survive 2 straight hours of workouts, but I might give it a try so I can take tomorrow off guilt-free. Since we're hosting tomorrow's dinner I'm sure I'll get some exercise from cleaning tonight and tomorrow anyway. Some day I'll run again, my heart's just not into running lately.

Happy Thanksgiving to all, I'll be back in December. And here are my handsome boys, they're growing up way too fast.

Really cool thing

We went down to the beach and playground this morning for a couple hours. The boys had a blast. I did manage to get myself to hanging upside down from the monkey bars. Mom's still got a little flexibility left, Hot Wheels seemed at least slightly impressed that mom was swinging by her legs.

There was someone down at the beach swimming this morning. Swimming, in regular swim trunks. The weather's in the 50s and the water didn't seem much warmer, that's a hardiness I just don't have in me!

We were walking on the beach and we saw a wind swirl picked up the leaves in a little tornado-like action and go across the parking lot. Hot Wheels wanted to run in the wind storm but he couldn't play in the parking lot. The wind tunnel moved across the lot and headed up the hill, Hot Wheels took off after it, but couldn't quite catch up for a while. Finally, near the top of the hill he got in the middle of it. The leaves were swirling all over and it was really cool to watch. It was moving slower and he stayed right in the middle of it for probably close to five minutes. Superman and I caught up and I held him in the wind tunnel for a little while, but the whipping wind and leaves made him nervous. A bunch of people were out walking and they came over to watch Hot Wheels running around in the middle of those leaves. Of course the camera decided to stop working right then, but it would have been hard to capture in a photo anyway. It was really cool. Another nice trip to the beach and playground.

The willpower of, well, someone without willpower

My calorie total from Thursday ended up not being so bad, 1810. (my recommended range is 1450-1800). Yesterday, however, is another story. I blew past the limit with a grand total of 2019 calories. I'm hoping the estimate's a little high because some items I didn't have exact nutritional info on so I used substitutes that I think might be a little worse. But, it's possible that it's the damage for yesterday. Of course tomorrow's the day I've got to fit into that size 6 dress, so today I've got to be better. Not likely since I've already had an apple turnover. Damn willpower, or lack thereof. I can be really good for a week or so and then I have a couple bad days. However, in the big scheme of things, like the rest of my life, a couple bad days isn't so awful. We'll see what happens at Monday's weigh in. To maintain would be fine with me for this week, I just hope to avoid a gain. Oh well, I get what I deserve in this case.

From here on out, I'm stealing the idea from Trimama's ultra cool blog and giving the kids new names. M. is now Hot Wheels, and C. is Superman. Those are 2 of the current favorite things in their lives. M. had been completely obsessed with cars since before he turned 2. C. was a little harder to pin down since he doesn't really have a singular obsession, I almost went with BusBoy, but it sounded a little like I had chosen his future career path. It's fine if he wants to be a bus boy some day, but I don't want to limit his options. Other ideas with PlaydoughBoy, Airplane or Nature Boy- since I swear, he'd live outside if he could. Speaking of which, we're off to the local park and beach for some play and run around time. I love the weekend.

Excuses while swimming with Santa, tumbleweeds and a rocket

First things first:
I've got a cold.
After one night of sleeping through the night, I've been up since 3:26am with C. (Whom I love so much and like to see any time outside of 10pm -4am)
It was my third 50 of the 5th 200 (for a specific incident I will reference later).
Now that the excuses are out of the way.

Santa swims at the pool. If this guys doesn't have at least a seasonal job as Santa then no one should. He's even got the small wired framed glasses, that I think he wore while kicking. Just seeing him made me smile through my next 400 set.

I hate hair. Not a great segue there, but it's true. The shower drain when I had longer hair- I used to have to ask Paul to clean it out. Hair makes me gag and hair balls could induce vomiting. (only human hair, pet hair isn't so bad with me) In the pool, there are these floating clumps that have a rolling tumbleweed shape and they move around the pool. Usually they're down at the bottom which is fine because I can keep my eye on them as I swim over. A couple weeks ago, though, one was in my lane and it was a good 6-8 inches long and it kept moving. Finally after about 20 minutes of swimming around it and trying not to gag over it too much, I asked the guard for a small skimmer to get it out. This morning there seemed to be more tumbleweeds than usual but they were on the bottom in the deep end so it was okay. I just kept my eye on them. However, on the first 50 of one of my 200s, I felt my right hand had a long hair around it. I tried shaking it while I was pushing back, hoping it would come undone, but it just wouldn't. When I got to the next flip turn I managed to grab it with the other hand before pushing off, and I only gagged once.

Finally, the human rocket story. When I got to the pool it was more crowded than usual so I had to share a lane. I ended up in the lane with a woman from work who took the year off from winning the work sponsored sprint triathlon this year. Notice I didn't say she took the year off from competing, she took it off from winning. I think she's won every time she's entered. She's fast and looking at her you can tell she's fast. She just looks hot, and fast. Anyway, I tried to make sure I didn't start any laps right before her, knowing she'd blow by me in a second. Then, in 1 of the 200s she did end up behind me and I stayed ahead! I was so excited but then I thought maybe she's doing the swim-as-slow-as-possible drill for some reason. Finally, on my last 200, during the third 50- always the roughest for me, while I was full swimming, she passed me while pulling. I was hoping she at least had the hand paddles, but no, she was just pulling. She did have a pull buoy which made me feel a little better, but I might as well have been treading water for how quickly she just swam away. It was a little sad. I finished my 200 and when she had a break I joked about how sad it was that my full swimming is so much slower than her pulling and she actually apologized for passing me! She's fast, she's hot and she's even so nice that I can't dislike her for being fast and hot. I've spoken with her before and she's always been so nice, which is why I was thinking I could joke with her about it and not offend her. She's rehabbing a knee injury, but I hope to some day be able to be beaten by her in the work triathlon. Meaning I hope she'll be well enough to compete again and unless she loses a limb during the race, she'd beat me.

Other than that, the swim this morning wasn't so bad. I did five sets of 200 medium pace, 100 kick, 100 pull. That's 2000 yards again, in 45 minutes or so. My time on the 200 is consistently 3:36. Actually the 200 where I was attacked by the hair, that one was 3:35, but the rest were all 3:36. Not too bad, I guess.

We took the boys out to eat last night. I know I went over my calorie range for the day (haven't actually calculated yet, but I know it) but the sweet potato fries at the restaurant were awesome. It's a vegetarian/vegan restaurant that uses all natural ingredients. We both had sweet potato enchiladas, which were good. M. had a grilled cheese and C. had cheese pizza. Both were good, but the boys didn't eat much. They did really like the chocolate chip cookies we took home, though. They were pretty well behaved and sat quietly most of the time. Right before the food came they got antsy and we walked around the dining room looking at the pictures on the wall- we went early so we were the only ones in the dining room we were in- just in case. Overall, the meal was good but a little expensive and when the boys are there we have to eat so fast that we didn't quite enjoy it as much as when we went alone for our anniversary.

Walking can be work!

After kick-my-butt bootcamp this morning I decided to go with a walking workout rather than trying to run. Bootcamp was tough, I wish that class was 30 minutes instead of only 20. We were divided into teams for a couple exercises. We all carried our hand weights to one end of the room and then they had to carried one at a time by all the team members twice across the room. Then we had to side shuffle behind our step benches and touch our inside hand to the outside of the bench. The lateral shuffles always make me nervous because in the past I have forgotten to pick up my feet and fallen over, quite ungracefully. Anyway, I always leave there pretty exhausted, but it's fun.

For the walking workout I decided to start out at 4.4 mph and incline by 3% every 3 minutes. I made it up to 9% and then I was holding on to the rails, so I didn't do 12 or 15% as I have in the past. This cold is still a bit in my chest and breathing was getting tough, next week I'll try to get through the whole cycle. I also turned the speed down to 4mph at 9% and left it there for the decreasing incline heights. I walked another mile at 0% incline, 4.4 mph- so in about 30 minutes I managed to burn a grand total of only 200 calories. For the amount of effort it felt like I was putting in, it didn't burn nearly as many as calories as I would have thought, or liked.

So, if anyone's got some kid suggestions, here are the 2 scenarios. We've got M. at three and a half years old he's generally a happy kid. The thing that's driving us nuts lately is the constant asking for something. "I want milk", "I want a snack", "I want to watch kid TV", it's nearly a constant barrage. By the time I got home today, Paul was completely at the end of his patience. I took the boys out with me, we had to buy their nice outfits for a party this weekend, some shoes for C. and then we went to Chuck E Cheeses to play for about an hour. We're not 2 steps inside the door after we get home and M. is asking "Can I watch some kid TV?". I tell him no, he starts crying. How do we curb the constant asking for things?

Now the situation with C. He's currently asleep on the couch, has been for almost an hour. Unfortunately, this will mess with bedtime, but he absolutely refuses to nap during the day. He will stand in his crib and scream himself hoarse for up to an hour- Paul's generally given up by then. Some days he doesn't nap at all, but if there's a car ride, he'll generally fall asleep. Should they all go for a ride every afternoon to get his nap in? He can't be old enough to give it up permanently- he's not even 2 yet! Anyway, as much as I'd likely regret it- anyone got any ideas on these?

Overall it was a decent day. It's preformance review time of year at work, which is always a pain. Trying to put down on paper how you pretty much walk on water every day for just doing whatever it is that's your job. It's ridiculous. But, it pays the bills, I've got the gym and every now and then it's an interesting job. Still wish I could be at home with the boys, but until that winning lottery ticket falls in my hands, it's up at 4:30am and off to work.

The scale WAS wrong (yeay)

This morning it read 156.5. How I do I know that today was right and yesterday was wrong? I don't, but today is the one I choose to believe. Now I'm thinking last Monday's reading might have been too high, too, because last week was a good week, but I'm not sure it was -2.5 pounds good.

A little highlight for the day already this morning at the gym. Two different people asked me whether I'd lost weight recently. I didn't think the 2.5 pounds counted much so I just said I was working on it and thanked them for the compliment, that felt nice.

Yesterday afternoon we went Thanksgiving dinner shopping. We're hosting for much of Paul's family so there will be 7 adults and 6 kids at our house for dinner. Many of the things we bought to serve: soda, appetizers and snacks, are things that we don't really eat anymore because of the poor quality and the bad fats in them. It doesn't seem right to serve them to family if they're not good enough for us to eat. But trying to force people to eat "healthy" food isn't necessarily fun because then if they don't like it we're the weird relatives that serve weird food. Maybe next year I'll put more effort into finding tasty stuff that's still healthier than mozzarella sticks and chicken taquitoes. I wish I didn't hate to cook so much.

Week # 3 stats: Nov. 13-19

Weigh-in: 158 - I'm not just in denial, I'm quite sure the scale reading was wrong. When I got to the gym and weighed myself fully clothed on that scale I was still less than at home- sans clothes. For that reason, I'll check again tomorrow morning, our bathroom scale is often fickle. If I can't get consistent readings here I might switch to a Friday morning at the gym scale reading, accounting for the fact that I'll be wearing clothes there- much to the relief of my fellow gym-goers.

Anyway- here are the daily stats:
Calories: 1409- and I have achieved that which I never thought possible. I actually feel full and happy on less than 1500 calories. My meals today consisted of a bowl of Kashi and milk for breakfast, a Lean Cuisine panini sandwich for lunch, a snack of string cheese and then a yummy dinner of chicken breast and provolone on Carb Style wheat bread and a great salad with greens, strawberries, apples and pears with some balsamic spray. I had a few pretzel rods with the boys, too. I thinkI should add another protein in the morning, like some cottage cheese, so I'm not so hungry mid-afternoon, but the salad with dinner really filled me up and it was delicious.
Water: 70 ounces
Sleep: we're now on day 7 of not sleeping through the night, I'm doing better with it. I've been up since 3:30am every weekday morning, except last Tuesday when it was 2:30am. Anyway, last night was somewhere between 5-6 hours of broken sleep. I'm also dealing with a cold now, I've got a sore throat and my head's a bit "foggy", I hope it passes soon.
Mood: Surprisingly, really good. I had a good day at work and was really pretty productive.
Pedometer: 8388 as of now, it's retired for the night.

Workout: Elliptical trainer, random program level 9- not too challenging for 10 minutes before class. Then 45 minutes of circuit training. A good mix of relatively high intensity cardio with some light weights thrown in.

Tuesday:
Calories: 1485, still felt pretty satisfied on that for the day. I did have gingersnaps after dinner, but I saved enough calories for them. I love ginger snaps. I've got some Snyders Buffalo Pretzel Nuggets, too, I'm saving those for a special occasion. They're awesome.
Water: 70 ounces
Sleep: Who knows, one kid ended up in our bed and I ended up in the other bed with the other kid. Whatever.
Mood: Very good. Especially considering I've still got this sore throat and a naggy headache, too.

Workout:
Elliptical trainer- 20 minutes, 160 calories. Not too strenuous, but this cold is still sapping my aerobic energy a bit. Then Gutts & Butts class- always quite a strenuous workout, especially for the glutes and quads- lots of squats and lunges. Tomorrow's kick-my-ass bootcamp class, bright and early at 5:35am.

Wednesday:
Calories: 1385
Water: 80 ounces
Sleep: Finally made it through the night (only one quick wake up)! 7 hours.
Mood: Good, a little groggy at first though from getting a full night sleep.

Workout:
Kick-my-butt bootcamp. High intensity aerobic and anaerobic intervals with some weight work. Approx. 200 calories, 20 minutes.
Walking program: 4.4 mph with incline, decrease to 4 mph at 9%. Then a mile at 4 mph- 200 calories total, approx 30 minutes.

I just love to swim

Really, it's my favorite part of a triathlon which is good because I start in my comfort zone but bad because it's over first. Being the shortest part of the event and the only area where I might some day excel, it will really help me very little compared with how poorly I will always run- I hope to become a fair biker.

Anyway, yesterday morning's swim workout was a new thing for me- drills. I tried one arm swimming (a bit harder to breathe) and I did a thumb drill to get my elbow pointing straight out of the water. I didn't try the fist drill, just because I thought alternating 100s of the other 2 drills was enough drill work. I did a few 200's of easy swim, some 100's kicking and pulling and then some timed 100's. I was pretty happy to be able to repeat consecutive 100's at under 1:45. I know my form could improve still and speed will come with that, overall it was a good workout.

I've also got an event to train for! It's not really much to train for but it's something on the calendar. A friend at the gym is signed up for her first tri in July so I asked if she'd like to do a team event in June. It's a sprint-like distance (1/2 mile swim, 14.4 mile bike, 5 mile run), and I'll be the swim leg. I hope to be pregnant at some point in 2007 (I may have mentioned that already) so I'm not going to plan on a full event on my own. I'm going to keep up with training until I can't and if I'm not pregnant in July I'll do another solo sprint. I'm hoping I can talk Paul into biking and we'll find a runner for another race or 2, we'll have to see.

I ate too many calories yesterday, I was doing well until we went to a friend's house to play. While the kids were running around I was tempted and failed by eating a few too many dark chocolate almond clusters. But they were so-o-o-o good that it was almost worth blowing my calorie limit for the day.

Yesterday afternoon I went to get a haircut at the mall and there was a wait. While I was waiting I walked around the mall a bit and for some reason stopped in Ann Taylor loft. A store I've only shopped in once, it's a bit expensive and most of it's classier than my usual style. I headed back to the clearance racks and a gorgeous dress caught my eye. It's a burgundy-brown color and I loved it. It was with the size 10's so I grabbed it and headed for the dressing room. I tried it on and it's slightly snug but not obscene. I checked the tag for the price (originally $79.99, marked down to $29.99 and 30% off that), when I saw the price I also noticed the size- it was in the wrong section- it's a size SIX!! Gotta love vanity sizing, there's no way I'm that close to a 6. But, I'll take it. When I went to pay I noticed the cord belt had a frayed section, so they gave me a 10% discount. Final price? $18.89!!! What a deal. Now I need an occasion.

I'm a hit at nursery school

I went to M's class this morning and brought some dry ice and food coloring. I was a little nervous that the kids would get bored, it was a blast! We had fog with the dry ice and water, add a little dish soap and voila- bubbles that everyone loved. Then they had droppers with colored water to put into tubes, another bit of great fun, I guess. Even the parents coming to pick kids up hung around a bit for the fog and bubbles. It was a great time, but I was sweating- that's busy work keeping 15 3-year olds happy and occupied!

After that we went to get tires for my car. A really aggravating experience because Walmart didn't have the tired and then we get to BJs and realize that my stupid tires have some security lug nuts, that I don't have a key for. So we wasted over and our and half of our time for nothing. I've got to go back to the dealership for another lug nut key. Why on earth does my plain old low end Honda Civic have a key for the lug nuts?!?!?!

Now the boys and I are sitting watching Pixar's Cars, we bought it on Tuesday when it came out on DVD. The afternoon turned out very nice, if only I had more vacation time I could do this more often.

The only real downside to the day was that we were so hungry when we went to get tires at Walmart that I told the boys we could eat at the McDonalds inside. I figured I'd have a salad. Well, that store doesn't have the salads or the grilled chicken sandwiches. I had to go with a McDonalds Snack Wrap- fried chicken strip on tortilla, and I ate some of the boys fries. I was just so hungry. I felt like total crap after that I think that cured me once and for all of all fast food, other than the salads at McDonalds which I do like. The Asian salad's my favorite. Within half an hour my head and stomach were both really hurting and I was salivating for some fruit. We got home, I had an apple and eventually felt better. At least the snack wrap and fries were small enough that I should be able to stay well within my calorie range, a fried chicken sandwich would have made me feel worse and the calories would have been 3 times that of the snack wrap.

Tough morning

Spin class was tough this morning, I think it's partially due to being down the pint of blood after donating yesterday. The yoga after class, though, felt particularly good.

Last night was night #6 with a middle-of-the-night wake up. If the boys don't sleep tonight I may drown in the pool tomorrow morning due to exhaustion. But now that I've got a swim partner, I'll be there.

I get to leave work and make fog for a class of 3-year olds. I'm really looking forward to it!

Just an ordinary day

Here's a rundown on the highs and lows of this Wed.

Annoyances: First one actually happened on Monday. I got a great set of dinosaur books for the boys, but they're a little old. I brought them to work to lend to a friend for her boys. I left them in the parking garage right next to her car, and someone STOLE them. This is especially annoying because anyone that parks in the garage can darn well buy their own $35 set of dinosaur books and moreso because we all assume our work environment is so safe- apparently not.

I was annoyed that I couldn't get into the rhythn of a run this morning. I just couldn't recover after boot camp.

The microwave was constantly in use at lunch so I ended up eating almost 30 minutes late by the time I could warm up my Lean Cuisine.

It's self-review time once again at work, ugghh.

It's 8pm and neither of the boys show any signs of slowing down to go to bed.

Highlights of the day:
After my iron being too low since February, I was finally eligible to donate blood for Red Cross today.

I really do like Lean Cuisines and I especially enjoyed today's chicken enchilada lunch.

Playing with dry ice after work with the boys was a lot of fun.

Taking the boys to dinner at my parents was a good time.

The week's more than half way over, always a good thing.

Sleep, sleep, sleep

That's really all I want. I love my boys. They're great boys, they really are- between the hours of 6am and 8pm they are 99.9% wonderful and 0.1% normal toddler/pre-schooler challenging. However, between the hours of 8pm and 6am- or more precisely 2:30-4:30am, they are a pain. I don't know how a less than 2-year old can be awake from 6:30am- 7:30pm with only a 30 minute nap (often no nap at all), still yell for mom for about 20 minutes when he's put in his crib at 7:30p and then he's up again at 3:30am, ready to go. M. ended up coming in our room at 2:30am and he was coughing and restless so I couldn't get back to sleep. Then C. gets up at 3:30am yelling and being loud. I got up and brought him into M's bed and he talked to me, rolled around, played with my face, hid under the covers and was generally being social, despite me completely ignoring him, until he finally fell asleep 3 minutes before my alarm went off at 4:32am. M. has always been a awful sleeper, too. I've heard all the people that say it's our fault, any maybe it is, and so I'm dealing, I just don't have to be happy about it. The goal is to get the most people in the house the most sleep. Right now I seem to be the one that gets consistently less than I'd like. Some day C. will be too old to want to lay down in a bed with Mommy and give me hugs. Then I'll be a middle aged insomiac woman with nothing to do in the middle of the night and I'll miss our time together. I try to keep that in mind at 2:30am but it's not always by first thought.

On a happier note, it's practically a holiday at our house, Cars comes out on DVD today! We've got the popcorn all ready and after dinner it's movie night. We're all looking forward to it. Paul took M. to see it in the theater last spring but they didn't catch the last 30 minutes. It got a little too long for M. to sit. At least at home we can always catch what we missed when we watch it again and again and again.

I didn't have the energy to run this morning so it was 20 minutes on the elliptical trainer before Gutts & Butts class, a.k.a. a million squats and lunges. A lot of glute work this morning, I should be looking like a model for "Buns of Steel", and I know the buns of steel are there, well insulated, but there. That's the best I can do for now.

Week #2 stats: Nov. 6-12

Not sure which of these stats will be a regular, we'll give it a try and see.
Monday weigh-in & measurements:
159 pounds (yep, almost back to 160, yikes)
waist- 31.5"
hips- 38"
thigh- 23"
bicep- 12.75"

Daily stats:
calories: 1389
water: 70 ounces
sleep: 6.5 hours (not a good night)
general mood: tired and it's Monday
pedometer total: 10042 (plus some time at home after I changed clothes)

Workout:
treadmill 15 minutes @ 9:31-8:57 mile pace. Total- 1.65 miles, 220 calories
HR @ 15 min- 168, 16 min- 142, 17 min- 123 (hand held HR monitor on treadmill)
40 minute interval workout, high intensity step intervals. HR @ 40 min- 174 (10 second count) approx 450 calories

Overall workout was very challenging, felt dizzy in a couple intervals, more sluggish than usual- due to lack of sleep?

Tuesday:
calories: 1447
water: 80 ounces (many trips to the bathroom)
sleep: 5 hours (not a good night, again!)
general mood: tired
pedometer total: 9406 (plus weight lifting "credit")

Workout:
elliptical trainer- 20 minutes on random setting, 186 calories burned
Butts & Gutts- core and lower body strength training class, 40 minutes
stretching- 10 minutes

Wednesday:
calories: 1499
water: 76 ounces
sleep: 3 straight then 4 broken (getting better)
general mood: good
pedometer total: 12998

Workout:
Bootcamp- 20 minute HIGH INTENSITY aerobic/anaerobic interval class. Short but killer.
Jog then walk on the treadmill- 25 minutes. The running just wasn't happening, an incline walk at 4.5mph and then cool down at 0% incline. My heart rate was still above 140 most of the time.

Thursday:
calories: 1531
water: 70 ounces
sleep: 6.5 hours
general mood: good
pedometer total: 9374

Workout:
Spin class: a little tough this morning and I think after giving blood yesterday I just didn't have as much energy so I didn't push it as much. Then 20 minute yoga stretch, felt good.

Friday:
calories: 1811
water: 60 ounces
sleep: 7 hours, but broken after 4 hours
general mood: good
Pedometer total: 8942

Workout:
15 minutes on the track walking and light jogging- 1.25 miles.
Swim workout: 200 yards strong, 100 y kick, 100 y pull, repeated
100m 1 arm drill, 100m thmb drag drill, repeat
2x100 all out
200 cool down
Swim workout felt good

Time to get real

There are a few things I've been just sort of pussy-footing around and not getting to business. That's coming to an end.

My weight is becoming an issue again that must be addressed. Years ago I got down to 140 pounds and I said to myself "If I ever see 150 again, it will be time for drastic measures". By the time I checked the scale it was a couple pounds over 150 and I just didn't have the will power to do anything, so I let it creep. It was a fast creep, over 50 pounds in 5 years. Yes, I was pregnant at one point during that time but I was fat with or without the pregnancy. This time I got down below 155 and I said "If I ever see 155+ again, it will be time for drastic measures". Well, since I was below 155 for about 3 consecutive days, as it rose again I reasoned that I was training for my triathlon and therefore not a great time to make big diet changes that could make me weaker. (The real flaw in that reasoning is that I could have given myself FREE SPEED by dropping a few more pounds before the race.) Also, I listened to all the well-meaning but misinformed people that said things like "well, muscle weighs more than fat so you're just building muscle". I dislike that phrase because a pound is a pound whether it's muscle or fat, people are trying to say that muscle is more dense than fat so it takes up less space, but I was not getting smaller anywhere, so that wasn't the explanation either. People told me, you need to keep your strength up for training, you look great, blah, blah, blah. Because it's what I wanted to hear, it's what I heard, even though I really knew it wasn't true. So here I am, approaching 160 pounds I think- I've been avoiding the scale like the plague and now it's time to get real. I've got a legitimate 12-15 pounds that have to go, and if I get to 145 and still see room for improvement, I'd like to get back to 140. That's issue number 1. To that end I'm going to start posting daily calories in and exercising done. I'll post a weekly weight/stats thing. As if anyone cares, but I'll be more honest with myself if I have to be honest with anyone interested in reading.

Issue number 2 is my running. I've got to keep doing it otherwise it will never improve. I seem to have a good week (2 weeks ago) followed by a poor week (last week). It just means more time on the treadmill, track or just out running. Unfortunately, the treadmill is what works best with my schedule so I'll take what I can get. It just has to be done.

Issue number 3 is my organization. I've always been very organized at work. I'm good at working with deadlines and I can multitask very well. My work personality doesn't seem to come home. Maybe it's the lack of deadlines and to-do lists, but I can't get things done as well at home as I do at work. It's time for me to start giving myself to-do lists, picking a chore and giving myself a deadline. Yesterday I finally got around to cleaning the kitchen floor grout and I realized it's time to re-grout and seal. That's got to be done before we host Thanksgiving, so there's a deadline. The fridge needs to be completely cleaned and the deep freezer needs to be defrosted. Then there are the more mundane- cleaning the bathrooms, changing the sheets, vacuuming the rooms, folding and putting away laundry. Maybe daily/weekly to do lists would help. I'll give that a try.

I have to admit something that I did not admit at first. I don't write this blog just for me. If it were just for me, it would be a journal in my desk drawer, or a Word file in //MyDocuments. I don't think anyone that has a blog could truly be keeping it just for them, why make it public then? At first it was just for me, because no else knew it existed. Now I've had some comments and visits and it's much more fun to think that someone else might be interested in hearing what I have to say. I'm looking for any feedback to some of the daily life stuff that I deal with that I'm sure is common to others. We can all use some help sometimes.

Finally, I have to congratulate all the competitors out there, bloggers and non, that took that starting line yesterday in Florida. Whether they reached the finish line or not, they trained, they had all the heart and soul necessary and they're iron. Congrats for an admirer and some day Iron-hopeful.

Ending on a high note

This week has not been great. My workouts have been completely uninspired (or undone, as in Wednesday) and I've eaten like crap. Good grief, I ate a Hostess Cupcake last night!! I'm thinking the awful diet choices I made led to the headache that hit me yesterday afternoon. I took half a sick day, went home and napped with C. for a couple hours. I was still able to get to sleep last night so that means I really needed that nap.

Anyway, enter, the pool. This morning I was in the water at 5:05am and I completed my longest continuous swim ever! I did 80 lengths= 2000 yards= 1828.8 meters= 1.14 miles in 39 minutes and something. That's approximately 34 minute mile pace. It's the first swim workout I've done on my own where I got really tired out. After 60 lengths I dropped out many of the flip turns, especially if it was going to mess the rhythm of my breathing. I'm a bilateral 3-stroke breather. It felt pretty comfortable, though. I could have pushed harder I supposed but that wasn't the point. If I had pushed harder I might not have made it as far.

An acquaintance from work arrived as I hit the last wall at 80 lengths, I ended up doing a few laps of kicking and then a last full stroke set. We have a very similar pace so we're planning to swim together on Fridays. That pace was a little faster than my 1+ mile pace, but it still felt like I could sustain it for a while. It will be nice to have someone to train with. She's preparing for an iron distance event next September and she's already got biking and running training partners so she was also looking for someone to swim with. A nice fit. I'm feeling back on track now. Even though it is Friday- which is blueberry pancake day, I think I can get back on track with the diet, too. Halloween candy's got nothing on my willpower, I hope.

Wish list

I forgot, now that Halloween has passed it's time to start thinking about... Christmas, right? Oh wait, there's another little holiday in between with lots of food and stuff. Anyway, for the past few years I've been saying "I don't need anything for Christmas or my birthday" (birthday is Dec. 28th. But now I've got this new interest with never ending opportunities for stuff. Here are some things I was thinking I'd put on my list, knowing I'll get one or two most likely.

-HR monitor. What kind? Are the ones with bells and whistles worth it, will I grow into graphing features and such? Or do I start with a cheaper model and plan to upgrade in a few years?

-Swim stuff- fins and paddles, what's more useful? Are the hard plastic paddles better than the swim gloves? What's the difference?

- New bike shoes. Mine are a bit on the small side, any recommendations? I wear a women's size 11, I think that's a 43 European size, not small feet.

A new bike is a few years down the road if I stick with the sport. I'll need new swim suits but no one else can really buy those for me. Any other ideas on things you couldn't live without. Well, could live without, but not as happily.

And more pictures

I always like a nice end-of-the-beach-season picture. We're so lucky to have nice beaches only a 5 minute drive away. Some day it will be a good family bike riding trip, but they're all a pretty major road so it will be a few years.

Finally, the boys just hanging around having fun together. As brothers often do when they're not busy antagonizing or hitting each other.

Gratuitous kid promotion

Here's the post where I have too many pictures of my boys. (Not that I think such a thing exists, but you might) I did not feel like working out this morning, so I "slept in". That's in quotes because 5 minutes after I turned off the alarm, M. woke up with a cough and then about 20 minutes later C. was up, too. I stayed home until just after 6am so Paul could get a little more sleep because he wasn't feeling well either.

I'm not sure how the pictures appear in the post, so the description might not be close to the picture it's describing but if you care I'm sure you can figure it out- the date's on most of them.
Here they are last night just before trick-or-treating. It's hard to imagine that C. isn't even 2 years old yet. He keeps up like he's 3. Poor guy couldn't reach the door as quickly as M. so people would open the door and say "Look, it's Spiderman!" and C. would be running for the door yelling "Thomas Engine, Thomas Engine!". He just wanted everyone to see him, too. They were good for about 14 houses and then they were done and we walked back. Next year I want costumes for the dogs, too, who were also very good. Most perfect weather ever for a Halloween.

And you've got to love the day after Halloween sale, so here's a picture of them wearing 2 of the costumes I picked up today for only $5. I bought five of them, so they can dress up whenever they want.

Squat

That would be 2 things- my motivation level for the today and the most common activity of Gutts and Butts class this morning. I've decided that lunch time spin class just doesn't work for me. I'm a morning workout person for many reasons. I've got more energy, and it gives me more energy for the day. I don't like the gym itself at lunch, either. It's more crowded, it's smellier, it's messier and then I've got to deal with sitting at my desk sweating for a good portion of the afternoon. At least in the morning I'm the only one here so I can turn on my fan and sweat in peace but in the afternoon people will ask if I'm alright, it's just a pain. As of today, no more lunch time spin class. At least not this session. Apparently I'm not as motivated to burn calories and lose weight as I should be. Also, I enjoy my break at lunch time, which I don't get if I'm at the gym. Whine, whine, whine, maybe I should get some cheese to go with my whine. Not allowed to complain about not losing weight if I'm not really working as hard as I should. Done.

I could take me (stupidity for the day)

This morning was kickboxing class at the gym- it's aerobic kickboxing so non contact, usually. We were doing a drill with lateral shuffles followed by uppercuts and a hook. I have a tendency to not pick my feet up high enough and once I took a side shuffle tumble into the floor. Since then I try to concentrate on picking my feet up. The instructor reminded us about good form on the punches and for some reason when I tried to concentrate on my uppercut, I didn't pull it fast enough and I hit my own chin. Another mysterious habit of mine is to often bite my tongue during class. Like little kids that stick their tongues out when exerting themselves, mine doesn't stick out of my mouth but it's often between my teeth, as it was during that drill. So, I punched myself in the chin causing my teeth to rattle each other, thus biting my tongue and drawing a little blood. Fortunately nobody else saw that display of incredible form and grace. At least now I know if I ever had to fight myself, I think I could take me.

Yesterday was speed work that had nothing to do with anything physical. Our church had speed pie-baking for an upcoming bazaar. The goal was to make 60 pies in 60 minutes and if we didn't exactly make the time cut-off, we certainly were close. I was a crust roller, so for an hour we stood in the kitchen rolling out the dough. I'm so not handy in the kitchen, but I was able to at least be a body to help, even if I didn't produce the most beautiful crusts. I purchased one of the pies before leaving and baked it last night. After dinner I offered the boys pie or yogurt, they both chose yogurt- so I ate the pie. No one will ever make an apple pie as good as my mom's, I'm sure, but I always like apple pie. It was nice to get out and see people for a while on a nice fall afternoon.

Then, with the time change, the boys were in bed at 7:30 and 8pm. It was great. I read a book for a while and then I think I was asleep by 9pm. I'm not going to let their bedtimes creep up again, this schedule will work out fine. They're both excited for Halloween tomorrow, I'll have to post pictures of them all dressed up.

Technical difficulties

This was going to be the second day of my 3-events-in-24-hours event. Unfortunately, I was interrupted by a power outage that prevented the run part. So, for this month I've got the swim and bike finished. I'll try to do it again next weekend.

500 meter swim (550 yards): 10:02. I was pretty happy with my time considering I have not swam a stroke since August 30th. I even dusted off the flip turns, which I haven't done in probably 10 years. Twice I had to settle for an open turn when my breathing rhythm didn't sync up with the end of the lap. The first flip turn I swam in too close to the wall and my butt hit on my way over. One time I also flipped about a stroke too soon so when my legs reached for the wall I got nothing. Even with 25% poor flip turns, approximately 2:00 per 100m isn't too bad, in my opinion. Considering I've done far less swimming than biking or running since May, I think I could easily improve on that, which would be cool.

T1: 58:00. I swam about 500 yards after the times set, drove to work, got an experiment started and then headed down to the gym.

15 mile bike: 41:41. After two 45 minute spin classes this week (Tues/Thurs) I opted for the exercise bike. I think I had the level set too easy because my cadence was 90-110 the whole time, even though the random program had "hills". But I gave it a good tough effort and I was pretty happy with the result.

T2: Was supposed to be approximately 21 hours, because I got back too late last night to run before going to bed. Granted, too late was 7:30pm, but I had eaten not long before coming home and I'm not good at running so soon after eating. Just 15 minutes after getting up this morning, though, the power went out- therefore the treadmill was out of order. The power went out because there was a rain storm and 50mph winds, so an outdoor run wasn't happening either. Most of my runs are on the treadmill anyway, even though it's not what many people consider a real workout, it works for me.

Today, the boys and I went out to lunch with grandma at a local pizza restaurant that has model trains set up throughout the restaurant. It's a big hit with the kids and the pizza and salads are excellent. Then we hung out with grandma and grandpa, watched Monsters Inc and had an enjoyable afternoon. So the run not happening wasn't the end of the world. Of course, I could have run now instead of sitting here on the computer but that window of opportunity and motivation passed with the power outage this morning.

Computer help

Not sure what happened but it seems my blog wasn't publishing for a few days. I think it's alright now.

Not only Prince Spaghetti Day

Wednesdays are my recovery from 2-a-day-Tuesdays now. My plan has been to get through boot camp at 5:35am and then do a longer run on the treadmill but Tuesdays are tougher than I anticipated. Gutts & Butts at 6am does a lot of squats and lunges, so the noon spin class is a bit tougher on my legs than normal. So after the high intensity cardio/weights during boot camp, I just don't have much left in me to run. I managed some jogging at 6mph and then switched to walking at 4.4mph for a while. I bumped the incline up to 2% for most of the walking, the treadmill HR monitor said I was still in the mids 130's, so I know I was still working. I got in 30 minutes, and called it a day.

I did get a free acupuncture treatment yesterday. They needed a volunteer at the health fair and I've always been interested in acupuncture so I gave it a shot. Apparently my liver and stomach were holding a lot of frustration and anger, and they were blocking my kidneys from interacting with my heart. That would be bad. After about 30 minutes with some pins in my feet, legs, stomach, collarbone and one in the middle of my forehead, I was deemed more in balance. I don't really feel any different, but he did say it might be subtle. I can honestly say that while I'm not afraid of needles, for anyone that is, I didn't really feel most of them at all. A couple of times I felt him tapping the needle into place, but it didn't feel like a needle, just a tapping of sorts. It was interesting.

Tomorrow will be my first 24 hour event. Not nearly exciting as that title might sound, I'm going to complete the sprint 3 triathlon legs, going at a pace that pushes myself, within 24 hours. The pool opens at 5:15am, so I'll get in my 550 yards (502 meters) first thing and head to the gym for a 15 mile bike ride. If I can't get a spin bike with an odometer I'll have to settle for the regular exercise bikes, but either way I'll get there. I don't know whether the run will be tomorrow night or Saturday morning, we'll see what's on the schedule. It will likely be a treadmill run anyway, so it won't matter too much with time.

Another way to ruin the life of my kids

Become a triathlete, apparently.

I was reading a message board yesterday and I came to 2 realizations. First is that I’m not much of a message board person. I like reading for information, but people are so quick to get insulting and rude, all over relatively small issues. There are very few things in life that get my panties in a bunch enough to write nasty things about someone that I’ve never even met. Of course how much better am I if I come over to my blog and talk about all of them behind their backs. Guess I’m the bigger coward. Second is that everyone thinks they know the best way to parent.

The issue seemed small to me, families running with athletes over the finish line at IM Kona. I think they also included any other IM, but it was in reference to Saturday’s race. I’ve seen some IM finishes and to be honest, I always assumed that it was perfectly fine to have kids run across the finish line with a finisher. Okay, I’m an ignorant triathlon-newbie that’s not well versed in all the rules. I know you can’t have outside assistance in the race, but they’re not really assisting, just crossing the line. I had thought that some day at my IM, my boys would run across the finish with me. Now I’m not so sure, because there were some very good points brought up. Some of the points, however, I thought were pretty ridiculous.

- Even if you’re well intentioned about not blocking the line, you could, potentially, block the finish line for someone else. People were really upset over the 3 seconds they might lose and I don’t think it’s that important, but it would be rude to get in the way of other athletes. (It’s unlikely I’ll ever be hardcore enough that 3 seconds mean that much of a difference, but I’m not knocking anyone that is.) Also it could potentially cause injury. On the other hand, single athletes crossing the line sometimes stop and block someone else’s way. Then there was the argument that you’ll ruin other athletes’ finisher picture with your whole family in the way. I think that one’s more far reaching because there must be more than one person crossing pretty regularly and it has to be quite common that something messes up your beautiful finisher photo. Besides, how many people really look good at the finish line? If you need to have a picture to remind you that you finished an IM, your life is way too busy, or you’ve become senile.
- I thought it would be cool to have my kids run over with me because it’s got to be one of the greatest moments in your life and I would want to share it with my family. I did not think I would do it to make up for the hours of neglect my children suffered while I was off training, leaving them at home cold, hungry and miserable. I’ll go back to that later.
- I do not think that letting someone else cross the finish line with you even though they didn’t complete the event or train for it will ruin their self esteem because they now have experienced the glory of a finish without the work behind it. (I’m paraphrasing on that one because it didn’t quite make sense to me at the time, or now, actually, but someone said something to that effect.)
- I don’t think it’s completely necessary, either, given that the actual finish line crossing isn’t really the defining moment of an IM, I would imagine. It’s more about the journey, and if my family has been an important part of that journey then maybe the actual crossing of the line is something I’d prefer to do alone. Since I’m nowhere near the finish line- or the starting line- of any event that life-changing, I’ll reserve my statements of intention until I’m on my way.

The part I’ve been thinking about most is how everyone had an opinion on the best way to parent. It always amuses me that the people that “know” best how to parent are those without kids. There are plenty of things that I said I would never do once I had kids. Since the kids were born they have in actuality, watched TV more than 30 minutes at a time, slept in my bed, eaten candy and/or Goldfish crackers with breakfast, not eaten all of their dinner and still had dessert, gone outside barefoot even if it’s chilly, left the house with a messy face and many other things I can’t think of right now. I’m pretty sure that C. will turn 2 in January and M. has managed to survive 3 years and 7 months of life in our care. Okay, he’s had one broken leg but that’s another story. They’re both great little kids, too. I know all parents say that about their kids so take it for what it’s worth but we have a really good time with the boys. We can’t be doing that badly.

People made it sound like training for an IM, or being a triathlete in general makes people put training and races above their family and children to the point of near ruinof their children’s lives. Will there be some time missed with family because of training? Yes. Almost everyone I’ve met or read about tries to find that balance between family time and training time. My training was all done before the kids even get up, except one Sunday morning training and the 31 hours that I was away for my race. Of the 31 hours that I was away, had I been home I would have been at work for 5 hours, I hope I would have been asleep for about 7-8 hours, and they would have been asleep for up to an additional 2 hours before I went to bed. Had I been home for those 31 hours, would their lives have been that much better? I don’t really think so. My family came to watch me in my second triathlon and after that, M. says that he wants to do swim, bike and run races when he gets older. The boys see that we exercise and try to eat well. We’re setting a healthy example for them by having outside interests involving exercise and sports. There may have been times during training when I was a little too tired to play with them as soon as I got home from work because I was up early for training. But there are times when we could be spending every single minute making magical memories by building every moment of free time around the boys, but I’ll still sit and use the computer, like right now. Right now my boys are here around me, left to amuse themselves with minimal parent interaction, the horror of un-entertained children. You know what? They entertain themselves and they’re fine. When I was younger I know my parents didn’t attend every single t-ball game, softball game, school function, etc. Know what? I still love them and I grew up fine. They made it to all the really important things and I never for a minute doubted their love for me and my sister. Did they give up all outside interests so the world revolved around us? Fortunately for us, no. If kids grow up as the complete center of the universe, at least in their household, how will they ever learn to deal with the real world when they leave home? So, I’m planning to keep in exercising and racing as family resources allow. I don’t think it will lead to years of therapy for the boys, or to the ruin of their lives. But what do I know, I’m just their parent.
Nobody is the perfect parent, but I think most of us are exactly what’s best for our kids.

Gonna be a good week

7:59 for 1 mile on the treadmill this a.m. Woohoo!! I won't be pushing any faster than that in the near future, I hope to maybe increase the amount of time I can maintain that pace. Today it wouldn't have been another 10 seconds, that was IT, all she wrote. Throughout the day today I notice a familiar tightness in my lungs, sort of on the verge of an asthma attack all day. That would be the final sign that I need to tell me I'm not to attempt a faster mile for a while.

After posting about being fat I was reminded of a funny experience. The other morning in a class at the gym someone was asking about when the torture would be over. Another participant said "It's not over until the fat lady sings", to which I responded in a lovely falsetto "La, la, la, laaaa. Now are we done?". He looked a little confused and said, "what?" and I laughed and said "The fat lady has sung, can we go?". He said "You're not fat", as if I was being ridiculous, and it hit me that I hadn't known him until after I started going to the gym and had lost some weight. So he really didn't think that I was fat. Maybe I'm not really fat anymore. According to the BMI calculators I've gone from an obese BMI of 30.4 to a normal weight (although on the high side) BMI of 24.4. If I can get down to 140 pounds that's 21.9. I think I'll always identify with being fat. There's a part of me that's afraid as soon as I don't think I'm fat anymore, I'll go back to those old habits and end up fat again. When I was fat I didn't think of myself as being as fat as I was. Even in mirrors I could somehow get around it. It was pictures that did it for me. Couldn't hide the double chins, round cheeks and round rest of me from that camera. Ugghh, gives me the shivers thinking about some of the awful pictures out there. But, it's just a snapshot of where I was at the time, and they are good reminders that I don't want to return. I've always been pretty quick with the fat jokes, too, only in reference to myself, of course. I think it's more of a defense mechanism. If I make fun of myself first then no one else will want to. Also, it might help other people if they're not worried about being insulted because I'm busy insulting myself. Whatever reason, that's how I've always been, maybe I should work on self esteem issues.

Back to tracking calories, more faithfully this time. My range is supposed be 1360-1780, a pretty wide range. That's based on attempting to lose approximately 1 pound a week given a 2000 calorie expenditure for workouts. It's from a weight loss site, so I'm not sure how realistic it is for real training periods. Since I'm not in serious training I probably don't workout much more calories than that, anyway. It's sad how easy calories are to take in, but how much effort they take to work off.

Glad I was fat

I guess I'm not really glad that I was fat, but along with everything else in life, you need the bad to give you better perspective about the good. When I was up there in the range of 200 pounds I knew I was unhealthy and a little more sluggish than I should have been but it all happened gradually enough that I couldn't feel the difference. I think that's the difficult part about gaining weight. No one gains 50 pounds overnight. I did gain it relatively quickly- about 10 pounds a year, but it's slow enough that I needed just a new pair of pants here, a new shirt there. Eventually I had accumulated 5 sizes of clothes in the closet. Some of the smaller clothes were still hanging there in the closet- as if leaving them in the closet made it more likely that they would magically fit one day. When my second pregnancy vaulted me over the 200 pound mark, I blamed pregnancy for slowing me down, not the extra weight, I had the skewed idea that I was still relatively healthy despite my weight. We ate reasonably well and I could keep up with M. who was a year and a half at the time- I must be fine, right? No. Wrong.

After C. was born I started paying attention to what I was eating. While I think we did eat good foods a good portion of the time, I was eating too much of the "good foods". It reminds me of that great Weight Watchers debate- are carrots worth 1 point or 2? The first part of the answer is that you probably don't need Weight Watchers because you've been eating too many carrots, and the second part is that even carrots can lead to weight gain if you eat too many. Although whenever I hear the suggestion that you should have some carrots when you're craving something sweet like chocolate I think that's a bit nuts. I have never eaten a carrot and thought "that was just as good as chocolate". For me the key was portion control- and the fact that I had none.

I'm fortunate that the weight partially came off faster than I gained it. It took me about 8 months to lose the first 30 pounds and then I lost another 10 in the next 6 months. I've been fluctuating within the range of those last 5 pounds for the past 6 months or so. I've still got about 15 more that I'd like to lose to get back to "wedding weight". Sort of like fighting weight for boxers, I'd like to get back to 140 pounds, where I was when I got married. I might have better muscle tone now, so if I look more fit at 145 I might be happy enough there. It wouldn't be worth it to stay above 150 just to retain Athena status for triathlons, so I'm hoping to no longer qualify when I race again. The best part about losing the weight is that I feel great and I can clearly see the improvement over how I used to feel.

I've heard people that criticize people who have gained weight and then lost it. They argue that it's more impressive to not gain the weight and live a healthy lifestyle in the first place. More impressive? Maybe. In a way I envy the people who have never gained weight, but in a way I'm glad that I did. I no longer take it for granted that I have energy to run, swim and bike. I can keep up with both of my boys and now I can fit through the tunnels at Chuck E. Cheese's, I do like Chuck E. Cheese's. I don't care if anyone's impressed that I lost weight, I didn't lose it to impress anyone. I lost it to be in better health so I can be a better role model for my boys. I'm not quite where I'd like to be yet, but I've got time.

Good from bad

Paul called me at work this morning to tell me that M's ear was seriously swollen and red when he got up this morning. I suspected maybe a spider bite, or even a bug bite since he was outside yesterday afternoon and the mosquitoes are out in serious fury lately. I didn't think much of it at the time but later he called and said that M's pre-school teacher called to say that it had gotten worse over the course of the morning. So he made an appt with the doctor and I met them at the office at noon. The bad part was that he had to go to the dr, but she suspected it was just a reaction to a bug bite and nothing more serious. The good is that I decided to take the rest of the afternoon off and hang out here at home. Tonight I'm even going to a dinner at the church- for women from church. No kids! I rarely get to meet anyone at church because I'm down in the nursery providing child care or teaching toddler Sunday school so I'm looking forward to having a chance to meet and talk with them.

It took a long time for me to want to spend time doing anything without the boys. I do have a lot of the classic working mom guilt. People have made comments to me that it must be so much easier for me knowing that the boys are home with their dad all day instead of in day care. For the most part I agree with that sentiment but for me it's also added a different guilt. I feel bad if I ever want to go out and leave Paul home with the boys again, since he is at home with them all day. There have only been a few occasions when I have gone out during the week and left them at home. Partly because spending time with my family is the thing that makes me happiest but it was largely out of guilt. Starting my triathlon training made me realize that I was starting to miss doing something for myself and it's not such a bad thing if I have some things that are just for me. So I'm going to enjoy some dinner and conversation this evening- sans guilt.

Magic Number 7

That's the number of hours of sleep I need in order to have a decent amount of energy for life, and workouts. It's unfortunately, NOT the number of hours I have gotten this week- a week when I wonder why my two adorable, wonderful, sweet boys want to kill their mom. Monday night was approximately 3 hours, I think Tuesday was about 4 hours and last night was all the way up to 6 hours. I felt a little better this morning, but my spin class output was a bit lower than usual. Yesterday, though, I was in serious danger of hurting myself because I couldn't even pick up my feet. I was planning to run on the treadmill, it turned into a pretty pathetic 2 mile jog and I kept wondering who put speed bumps on the treadmill because I kept dragging a foot on the belt. I was, fortunately, able to remain upright because I had visions of doing a face plant into the front display followed by a slow, embarrassing slide onto the floor behind the treadmill. I don't have too much hope for a fast run tomorrow morning before weights class, but as long as I get up and get to the gym that might be enough. I really had to fight the urge to sleep in this morning but once we finished class I was glad I got up after 4 minutes of inward cursing and fighting with myself about whether to get up or roll back over. Thanks to whichever half of me kicked the other half out the door to the gym.

A pleasant surprise

This morning my foot wasn't nearly as sore as I had expected during class. It was cardio intervals so there was a lot of stepping up onto and off of the step. The over-the-tops were a little tough because the sideways motion of stopping the move and reversing direction felt a bit unstable and a little hard on my foot. It didn't give out, though, and I think I should be alright to try running again tomorrow. I didn't want to wait too long before running again, especially having a good week last week, with 2 p.r. miles. The week has just filled up with plans and I don't see myself finding a day to get back into the pool, unless it's a family visit where there's no useful swimming to be done. Tomorrow I do have to leave work at 8am to watch the kids for the day so Paul can help my dad out with his boat. I'm looking forward to a day of at-home-mom stuff. I get to do the drop off and pick up for preschool, play for the afternoon and then bring dinner over to grandma's to celebrate her birthday. That should be fun.

Grandma bought the boys Halloween costumes yesterday. M. is going to be Spiderman and C. is Thomas the Tank Engine. M. was so excited about his costume that he wants to wear it all the time. Better than last year when he cried because I tried to put his costume on him. I just can't figure kids out.