Paul called me at work this morning to tell me that M's ear was seriously swollen and red when he got up this morning. I suspected maybe a spider bite, or even a bug bite since he was outside yesterday afternoon and the mosquitoes are out in serious fury lately. I didn't think much of it at the time but later he called and said that M's pre-school teacher called to say that it had gotten worse over the course of the morning. So he made an appt with the doctor and I met them at the office at noon. The bad part was that he had to go to the dr, but she suspected it was just a reaction to a bug bite and nothing more serious. The good is that I decided to take the rest of the afternoon off and hang out here at home. Tonight I'm even going to a dinner at the church- for women from church. No kids! I rarely get to meet anyone at church because I'm down in the nursery providing child care or teaching toddler Sunday school so I'm looking forward to having a chance to meet and talk with them.
It took a long time for me to want to spend time doing anything without the boys. I do have a lot of the classic working mom guilt. People have made comments to me that it must be so much easier for me knowing that the boys are home with their dad all day instead of in day care. For the most part I agree with that sentiment but for me it's also added a different guilt. I feel bad if I ever want to go out and leave Paul home with the boys again, since he is at home with them all day. There have only been a few occasions when I have gone out during the week and left them at home. Partly because spending time with my family is the thing that makes me happiest but it was largely out of guilt. Starting my triathlon training made me realize that I was starting to miss doing something for myself and it's not such a bad thing if I have some things that are just for me. So I'm going to enjoy some dinner and conversation this evening- sans guilt.